The GLS 63 AMG Is the Family SUV The Punisher Would Drive

This twin-turbocharged (or “Biturbo,” as Mercedes likes to call it) three-row SUV will have you burning rubber all the way to the school drop-off line. Only to rush you to the grocery store and back home in such little time you’ll think Lewis Hamilton was at the wheel.

For the record, I’m not a comic book book nerd, but when I look at this massive and mean looking SUV, I can’t help but to picture Marvel’s The Punisher at the wheel. I asked Google if the famed badass character had kids, and it turns out he did, so the Mercedes Benz GLS 63 AMG is officially The Punisher’s ride.

Under the hood of this 202-inches long beast lays a 5.5 liter V8 Biturbo engine, which manages to churn a ridiculous 577 horsepower and 561 lb-ft at an equally ridiculous 1750 rpm. Oh, and if The Punisher has a boat, then the GLS can also tow it, as long as it weighs under 7,500 lbs.

The 2017 GLS 63 AMG sports a face-lifted exterior, which brings it more up to par with the rest of the Mercedes models, though its interior design is already looking dated and quite inferior to the new and gorgeous C, S, and GLC interiors. That being said, the premium-grade Nappa leather and dark poplar wood are quite beautiful (in conservative fashion) and all three-rows enjoy plenty of ac/heat vents, cupholders, and armrests. After all, this SUV is designed for the 1% kids, and no one else.

One thing I refused to focus on while driving the GLS 63 AMG around town, was its price tag. The starting price for this bad boy is $125,000 bucks, but this particular model clocked in at a few grand north of that. Why would anyone need to spend $30k more than the price of an equally utilitarian and luxurious GLS 550? I don’t know.

But if you love gobs of horsepower, nifty AMG badges, have five kids, or happen to be The Punisher — this is your ride.

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Photos [@DrivesWGirls]