Fundamental Laws
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Fundamental Laws
Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become
coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or
you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll
to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability: The probability of being watched
is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: If you dial a wrong number, you
never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late
for work because you had a flat tire, the very next
morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will start to move faster than the
one you are in now (works every time).
Law of the Bath: When the body is fully immersed in
water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting
someone you know increases when you are with someone
you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone
that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Bio mechanics: The severity of the itch is
inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theatre: At any event, the people whose
seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee: As so long as you sit down to a cup of
hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something
that will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people
in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced
jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering
are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the
carpet/rug.
Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you
are.
Law of Direction: If you don't know where you are
going, any road will get you there.
Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you
don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Georgio's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Marlene's Law: As soon as you find a product that you
really like, they will stop making it.
Don's Law: The first bug to hit a clean windshield
will be very big.
Addendum to Don's Law: The first bug to hit a clean
windshield will hit directly in the path of the
driver's vision.
Jerry's Law: If you hate a subject, the person next
to your seat will talk of nothing else.
coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch or
you'll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll
to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability: The probability of being watched
is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: If you dial a wrong number, you
never get a busy signal.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late
for work because you had a flat tire, the very next
morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes),
the one you were in will start to move faster than the
one you are in now (works every time).
Law of the Bath: When the body is fully immersed in
water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting
someone you know increases when you are with someone
you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone
that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Bio mechanics: The severity of the itch is
inversely proportional to the reach.
Law of the Theatre: At any event, the people whose
seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee: As so long as you sit down to a cup of
hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something
that will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people
in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced
jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor covering
are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the
carpet/rug.
Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you
are.
Law of Direction: If you don't know where you are
going, any road will get you there.
Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you
don't know what you are talking about.
Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.
Georgio's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.
Marlene's Law: As soon as you find a product that you
really like, they will stop making it.
Don's Law: The first bug to hit a clean windshield
will be very big.
Addendum to Don's Law: The first bug to hit a clean
windshield will hit directly in the path of the
driver's vision.
Jerry's Law: If you hate a subject, the person next
to your seat will talk of nothing else.
