So I gotta tell you guys what happened to me last Thursday. As you may or may not know, I bought my car to have a little fun on the long commutes on open freeway that I regularly travel. I had to attend a business meeting in Paso Robles which is about 150 miles from where I live. Getting there involves a beautiful drive down through the Salinas Valley on 101 while passing farms, vineyards, and a military base. As I had no desire to have anything happen before my 10AM meeting, I set my cruise control at 75 and listened to my iPod (sound from the AUX jack in the glove box ROCKS by the way) for about and hour and a half while enjoying the cruise.

After that hour and a half and about 1 hour before Paso Robles, the road opens up and visibility is good for a few miles down a very straight 2 lane empty highway (excluding the few semis in the right hand lane). Right where it opens up the road has shallow negative grade until it gets to an overpass where it immediately becomes a shallow positive grade. I began to open her up, but then thought the better of it as I had no way to tell if there was a CHP officer on the bridge. So I cruise through overpass and see no cops. At the top of the shallow grade the road heads back down again and the road is again clear for the next few miles.

Since this was the same stretch of road, just 101 South instead of 101 North (coming back from Paso Robles) about 50 to 60 miles long that I recently (3 weeks ago) had an average speed of about 130 with a few (actually a lot of) short sustained bursts at 155 , I said to myself, “**** it, I’ve been ***** footing around the whole drive so far” and smashed on the gas. Within a very short time I saw the speedo at 145…then 150…then 155…then to my surprise 156 and finally 157.

“****in sweet, this car is bad ***,” is what I said in my head to myself. I then proceed to hold the car between 155 and 157 for the next 2 minutes or so (9:00 to 9:03). Later, (once I had stopped shaking after the following incident) I figured this to be about 6-7 miles or so. In that time I passed 3 semis and one jackass in the fast lane that I blew by on the right. Unfortunately , the sky was cloudy, it started to sprinkle, and I saw lighting in the distance directly in front of me, so I let off the gas, moved over to the right, and coasted back down to 75. Its 9:03 on the dash, I’m feeling a huge adrenaline rush as I’ve gotten up to 155 before but never had enough room to hold it for anything close to that amount of time. So I continue cruising at 75 for another 5-6 minutes when I see what appears to be a CHP car way off in the distance in my rearview mirror…

After having just calmed down the adrenaline starts to surge even stronger again as thoughts of getting pulled over at gunpoint, being arrested and thrown into jail flood my mind. My heart is pounding at ridiculous beats per minute and feels like its hammering my chest. The car, of which I can now just make out the lights on top, is in fact a CHP vehicle. The officer makes no attempt to swoop up on me, but creeps up until he is about 1-2 car lengths behind and beside me in the fast lane. I look down at my dash and see that the time is now 9:09, at least 5 minutes after the end of my high speed run.

I think to myself, “He must have got on the freeway after I had ended my run or he would have swooped up on me faster. Cool, maybe he doesn’t know.” This point start to validate itself as the cop then pulls up parallel to me and just looks my car over. He then proceeds to gun his vehicle past mine until he is about 5-7 car lengths ahead of mine. “**** me, I just missed that cop. Damn, I’m glad I slowed down when I did. Man that would’ve sucked if I missed the meeting.”

So now my eyes are glued on this CHP car and I’m watching him slowly gain distance until he is about 10 car lengths ahead of me. At this point he starts tapping his brakes to maintain his distance while slowly wandering over the yellow line in the center divide. “Oh ****, is he looking back at me?” I see him looking over his shoulder, and at the side mirror. I’m feeling a little less confident and little less jittery now. “No ****ing way. I was long gone before that fool jumped on the freeway.” I look down at the clock and see the time is now 9:10 when all of a sudden the CHP vehicle pulls a “Super Troopers” move, slams on his brakes, ducks behind my car, and lights up everything he has.

“Oh ****!, oh ****, oh ****, oh ****, oh ****, oh ****. I am ****ing going to jail. I am going to miss this ****ing meeting, get fired, ****ing lose my job, oh ****, oh ****, oh ****.” The adrenaline comes back with a vengeance and I go into auto-pilot by slowing down, putting my blinker on etc. while immediately starting to do my best to calm down by breathing deep and forcing myself to relax. I pull on the right side shoulder and put my hazard lights on when all of a sudden the officer’s PA system comes on and he says, “Keep going, don’t stop on the bridge.” I wake up from auto pilot, roll the car forward past the bridge, move the car further to the right onto the dry grass, and put the car into park. I see the officer coming to the passenger side, so I roll the window on that side down about half way.

I look over to the right as he approached the window. When he gets up to the window he bends down to look through and the conversation goes as follows:

CHP Officer (all business): “How ya doing?”

Me (trying to be a smooth operator): “I’m doin' well sir, and yourself?”

CHP Officer : “I’m doing OK. Where you headed?

Me: “Paso Robles for a business meeting.”

CHP Officer: “Paso Robles for a business meeting huh? Where ya from?”

Me: “San Jose”

CHP Officer: “Do you have your license on you?” He didn’t ask me for registration or insurance, but that might be because I still have no front or rear plates.

Me: “Sure, let me get it.” I dig into my right pocket, pull out my license and hand it to him. He looks over my info for a few seconds…

CHP Officer: “You just get this thing?

Me: “Yeah”
CHP Officer: “How long have ya had it?”

Me: “Uh..um..About 6 weeks now.”

CHP Officer: “Oh..Ok. You just open it up a little back there?”

Me (considerably less a smooth operator): “Yeah.” Like a jackass I just admitted to speeding.

CHP Officer: While looking at the car from front to back, “Well, I pulled you over for speeding, but you were going to fast for me to clock you. I had to pull up in front of you car to be sure it was the one I saw, but I’d estimate that you were going about 100.”

As soon as he said that I did my absolute best to stifle the chuckle that almost left my mouth. While keeping as best a straight face as possible I thought to myself, “A 100. Is he ****ing for real? There’s no way it would have taken him 5 minutes to catch up if he caught me when I was slowing down.”

My mind is ****in’ racing at this point. “Did he just say, ‘you were going to fast for me to clock you?’ Did he just admit that he didn’t get my speed? Holy ****, I can use that in court. I might be able to get out of this one.” My heart starts beating faster again, and I wait for him to write me the ticket.

CHP Officer: “Normally, I’m Ok with a little extra speed. Just keep it down until you get to Paso.”

Me (still waiting for the ticket): “No problem sir”

CHP Officer (as he hands me my license back while looking at the car again): “You have a nice ride. Make sure you use the shoulder to build up speed before you get back on. Have a nice day now”

The officer then walks back to his vehicle, leaving me absolutely stunned sitting in my car. “Holy ****, I almost went to jail. Did that just ****ing happen. Is this a joke? Is he coming back? Use the shoulder to build up speed? Does he know what he just pulled over?”

Now I’m being a bad *** because the officer has gone back to his car and I know that just avoided some serious jail time and/or perhaps the loss of my license. “Use the shoulder to build up speed?! You’re ****ing trippin’. Let me show you what’s up.” With that I rolled back on to the shoulder off of the grass, looked over my left shoulder to see that the coast was clear, and stomped on the gas while merging onto the freeway. The officer up looked when he heard the roar, but since I only floored it until I hit the posted speed limit of 70, there was not much could do. I would have loved to have seen the look on his face when I just took off effortlessly.

I cruised the remaining 30 minutes or so to Paso Robles and felt ok, but still wired after what just happened. When I pulled into a spot near our Division office and turned off the engine, I took my hands off the steering wheel and noticed that they were still shaking. I calmed my self down again and went into the building and the meeting with the biggest **** eating grin ever. I was seriously in the best mood of my life. I haven’t been able to write down this account without feeling that surge of adrenaline again!

Now that I look back, I realize that the CHP officer must have though it was some sleek, small, sports car going blowing by him at 155 and not my big sedan which is why he took so long to pull me over. He must not have been able to get a good look.

Anyway, there will be no more postings of high speed jaunts from me for a very long time. I took that incident as a sign and will now be using the car exactly as I intended when I bought it; that is, a solid highway cruiser with mad power that will be used strictly for passing and merging very quickly, assuming no one wants to race! Stop light to stop light is still game on as usual and all kill stories will still be posted.

What a ****in crazy *** morning!

 

Nice write up, definitely a good read. Glad you didn't get a ticket or anything, you're lucky!

 

WOW, what a great thread... I needed to read something like that. It put a big grin on my face!!! Makes me glad I bought the car!

PS. And glad you didn't get a ticket!

 

you were lucky alright....but I think he should have dropped the hammer on you

 

Time for you to invest in a Valentine 1, and a Blinder Laser Jammer.

 

Yeah, I never speed excessively without a valentine 1. But sustaining 155 is asking for it... not even a valentine will help there.

 

That was a great story.I must say you've got some big b***s taking off like you said you did after he let you slide.If that had been me I would've rode that shoulder for a mile before getting back on the highway,just like the friendly Officer suggested.

 

Great story.Sleepers do rock.

 

Nice story...Gotta love these cars!!

 

GIANT b***s!!

 

LOL. Just being cocky I guess. I was more annoyed that he didn't know what my car was or what it could do, so I decided to demo it.

No cop can you give you a ticket for accelerating fast no matter how quick you get to 60, and since the speed limit was 70 and that's what I went up to I technially broke no laws and therefore could get no ticket!

I do however have much more love for the CHP!

 

boy, are you in for a surprise then....because this can very well result in a citation.

 

Ray is correct, accelerating too quickly to even the speed limit on any road is subject to citation. This is legally called exhibition of speed (very broad) and if the copy wants to be a d!ck, he can right you up!

Be careful out there! You might be a great driver and these cars do handle extremely well but all it takes is an idiot driver to make a wrong move and good night!

Now, we need a W210 track day so we can all test our beasts and have a great "safe" time. Anyone have any ideas???

 

you, sir, are my new hero

 

A track day would be nice. I had fun last weekend coming back from Desert Hot Springs. Had my wife drive and she hit 130mph once. That was cool. On the way back I maybe hit 100mph once or twice. But for some reason I get yelled at. "Slow down" "Don't speed with me in the car" As she holds on to the OH Sh.... grip! What the F....! Women

 

I did not know this! But it would seem difficult for a cop to even measure how fast you accelerated right? And thus, this would definately be a ticket you could fight in court right?

 

This has nothing to do with how fast you're actually speeding. This has to do with the meaning of the citation exactly: "Exhibition of Speed." Accelerating too quickly, spinning tires, etc. is showing off how fast your car is and therefore, is subject to a citation. Good luck trying to fight in court a citation for Exhibition of Speed and the vehicle on the citation is an E55 AMG. The judge will probably laugh and double the fine, be careful!

 

i'm not sure why you're posting all this on a public msg board, this can be used as evidence against you in court

 

I believe that if he posted video proof of this, he could be in trouble, but I don't know if a written story will hold up.


Similar to me claiming right here and now to have just a$$-raped the Pope in his sleep. I don't suspect they'll come get me for that, unless I post a You Tube of me riding the old man while he's snoring. Hope I'm not wrong!

 

Well, you'll need to have lots of proof and actually eye witness the incident before a day in court. No worries...

 

let's say if that same cop decides to check out a E55 msg board and finds this here. who's gonna get a$$-raped??

 

Well, it's basically his word against the cop with some BS written in here and no eyewitness or signature on the spot on a citation. I know what you mean but I wouldn't worry about it. Now if he said he pulled away, pulled out his Glock and fired a couple of shots in the air and the cop didn't do anything about it right then, maybe I would worry, lol...

 

I doubt that this would ever happen, because if it did hardly anyone would be posting kill stories. Plus look at that clown Gustav on the W211 section. The stuff he posts is garbage he proposes to be truth.

I'm not worried about it, as I could have just as easily written that I went 220mph in an Aston Martin, yadda yadda yadda.

Here's my disclaimer:
All names, places, and vehicles in the original story were changed to protect the innocent. The Salinas Valley is actually the San Fernando Valley, Paso Robles is Imperial City, San Jose is Bakersfield, and the E55 is actully a highly modified '83 Toyata Tercel Hatchback. The CHP was actually a Forest Ranger.

 

Haha. Good thing hardly anybody knows what an E55 AMG is:

ME: "Yes, your honor it is a heavy 4 door sedan, see picture. Do you really think that this thing can get to 155mph?"

JUDGE: "No"

ME: "Exactly"

JUDGE: "Dismissed"

 

why would you post this here?....what's if have to do with the price of tea in china?......and why are you guys giving this turd props?....and this guys how old?...I heard they don't have business meeting in paso robbles.....they just sell ******